trying harder doesn't tend to fix things for me. if i'm at a place where i think "if only i was trying harder, this would work right", it's usually that i am trying my hardest, beating my head against the wall, doing damage to myself-- and it's still not working, and i don't have anything else to give.

so that leaves trying differently. for me, that seems to involve walking away from what i think the problem is, so that i can deal with whatever is underlying it. then the hardest part is remembering to not turn around and poke some more at the apparent problem.