my ex and i used to have discussions/arguments about having kids in which "they screw up the rest of your life!" would frequently come up.

"yes. yes!" is what i would always say.

dooce seems to be able to explain this better than i can.

dooce: Reformed

Sometimes Jon and I talk about what life was like before we had a baby, before the dog, before the ongoing chaos of those responsibilities. And I remember during those first months of Leta's life when I had a hard time going ten minutes without giving in to a nervous breakdown how I sometimes cursed the fact that we had gone and ruined our lives. Last night when confronted with that hollow silence, the silence of the way things used to be, all I could think was, "thank God we had a baby and ruined our lives."